Marriage is hard. Its the venture of two souls, two minds and getting into things you used to not do. Its nerve wracking, and its pretty much these set of thingamajigs which you never thought you'd process all at the same time and every thing just keeps being thrown at you piece by piece and you cant do anything but accept the things that come.
Im not saying what im going through is tough as heck, cause i know this is just the tip of the iceberg for some. But i know what im feeling is pretty much valid, and i hope no one invalidates me for this. But its just hard. I knew from the start new things rattle me, but I didnt know it was this hard. And im doing all these things alone, and im pretty much indistress. And its not that its intended to be such, it just was always been the situation from the start.
And im writing this just to put out all these things piling up in this brain of mine cause I swear, these is becoming too much to handle for me.
And im just trying so hard to get my message thru but im just always stuck at something and i cant get thru. Ive always lived life alone never needing anyone or at least try to suffice and learn to do things on my own but its just that sometimes you need people to actually help you thru the process of stuff, but I dont want to burden anyone with it. Its that time when I want my mama with me again to help me get passed this and hold my hand and help me with every step.
No one ever said it would be this hard. And im only just beginning. Baby steps.
and some one to hold my hand so i can get through...
someday, soon.
06.22.21
12:17am
